Dougtionary

mā-nāt’ə-mē
noun
A subsection of anatomy dealing specifically with man.

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Cās’trō-fĭz’ĭks
noun
A branch of science that originated in Cuba, which is primarily involved in building makeshift low profile sea vessels that can reach the United States.

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bī’ə-lôg’
noun
A conversation between two or more bisexual people.

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dōō-shĭm’ĭ-tər
noun
A high tech piece of scientific equipment that measures one’s douschemetric index, a rating scale ranging from 0-100. The higher the rating, the more douschier the person is.

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āl’mə-nāk’
noun
An annual publication about beers.

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spām’bŏŏsh
noun
The act of signing someone else up to receive a ton of emails from a third party, such as daily product emails, info on bedwetting, impotence, sex products, etc.

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hôr’ē-ənt
noun
A perk of business travel to the far east.

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gŭlfĭng
verb
Gulping a drink too fast and not being able to swallow all of it and either dribbling or spraying it on oneself or others.

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mə-rāl’kə-hô’lĭk
noun
One who drinks for the greater good.

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īd’l-ěs’əns
noun
The period in life from the time an untalented individual becomes delusional and tries out for American Idol (and then gets insulted by Simon), to the time they realize they are a talentless loser.

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sněst
verb
To sniff-test clothes to see if they are clean enough to wear before putting them on.
This technique is often used with clothes that are piled on the floor, or an item pulled from the hamper.

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ōō’běr’ē
noun
Short for Über berry.
The ultimate berry of all berries, it is chock full of vitamins and has more antioxidants than the wallaberry.

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lāt’nt ās
noun
One’s assic qualities that are often dormant or unapparent until you get to know them better or see them react to a high stress situation.

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gēk krēp
noun
When you aren’t much of a geek and without realizing, you slowly become more and more geeky.
A common occurrence with the current state and rapid change of modern technology.

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prāg’ə-nīz’
verb
To spend more time praying for something good to happen rather than taking action.

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hôrěg’ə-nō’
noun
A spice hookers use while they are “cooking”.
Weed/marijuana.

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hāf’ər-mā’shən
noun
Half-assing one’s affirmations or not really believing what one is declaring to be true.

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hâr’ə-sôl’
noun
Any substance packaged under pressure that is meant for spraying onto the top of one’s head.

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ə-noi’mən-tŏl’əjē
The science that deals with annoying others.
Although classified as a science, it is also an art form. One who masters this art form often has siblings.

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ə-noi’mən-tŏl’əjĭst
noun
A scientist devoted to and producing results in the field of annoying other people.
A specialist in annoying others.

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hāf’tər-māth’
noun
Only the first portion that results or follows from an event, especially one of a disastrous or unfortunate nature that was brought on by a stupid action and was easily avoidable with a little common sense.
The results of an incident, action or decision, when only half of the consequences have already occurred or become apparent [...]

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ās’thĭ-tĭsh’ən
noun
A specialist in ASSthetics.

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hâr’ē-ə-lĭst
noun
A harry eastern European performer that you might find in a circus or Cirque do Soleil type show.

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wāg’ə-nīz’
verb
To suffer extreme pain or great anguish before stepping on the scale.

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hāk’rə-bāt’
noun
An acrobat with very little skill.
One who believes themselves to be an acrobat after drinking alcohol, usually resulting in stupid tricks that hurt themselves but are great for the observer.
“Last night John drank a fifth of vodka, became a hackrobat and skied off the roof of the house.”

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hôr’kĭ-strə
noun
The screams of a group (gaggle) of hookers when the police show up.

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ād-shē’sĭv
noun
A clingy woman.

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vər-bōōz
adjective
Characterized by the use of too many words when one has been drinking excessive amounts of alcohol.

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pŭdn-ěr’ē
noun
One who is ordinarily a pud and probably deserves a slap in the back of the head.

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ĭn-sŏm’nē-āk’shən
noun
Any action one does when they are unable to sleep, such as reading, watching tv, pacing, etc.

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