Dougtionary

nĭn’jə-nōō’ĭ-tē
noun
A skill or cleverness in devising new ways to attack others or defend oneself.

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hām’bĭ-děk’strəs
adjective
The ability or tendency to eat pork products with both hands.

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jôn dĭs
name
A yellow skinned guy that has a bile problem.

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dĭ-shŭv’əld
adjective
Being in disarray due to being hit in the head with a device used for digging.

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ĭd’ē-ŏl’ə-jē
noun
The science dealing with the study of foolish people. (Although one could argue that you wouldn’t learn much.)

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kā’pər tôs
noun
A Mediterranean challenge that evolved from a mispronunciation of the Highland Games event, the “Caber Toss,” but instead of tossing a large log, one flicks a caper berry, and the player who sends the caper the furthest is the winner. This game is most often played at the dinner table, and it is an [...]

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kāsh-ē’mē-ə
noun
A financial disorder identified by individuals who blow their money on possessions and spontaneous purchases of unnecessary items rather than pre-meditated spending, solid financial planning and building net worth.
A financial disorder seen in those who make a lot of cash in spurts, such as a commissioned sales job, and then spend it just as quick [...]

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sěk’ənd sāt’ər-dā’
noun
A Sunday that gets treated like a Saturday, often with a lot of partying and high consumption of alcohol, which often results in calling out sick on Monday (a.k.a. “Second Sunday”).

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māk’rə-mō’nē
noun
The state of being devoted to Macintosh products and never cheating (as in buying or using a windows pc).

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ə-měr’ĭ-kən pā’sō
noun
A dollar bill, American currency which isn’t worth very much these days.

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kŭn’ə-rĭng’gəs
noun
Oral sex with an Asian.

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hām’yə-nĭsh’ən
noun
Officially refers to pork used as a weapon, but in common usage it can mean any food thrown in a food fight, used for self defense or used in an assault.

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hām’ō
noun
Short for “hammunition”.

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hĭp’ō-thět’ĭ-kəl
adjective
An assumption related to a large herbivorous four-legged mammal that lives in or around African rivers.

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trāf’ĭk vŭl’chər
noun
A driver who hovers in your blind spot or on your bumper, looking for a hole in traffic, frequently weaves between lanes and often uses right or left turn lanes, shoulders and center lanes for passing.

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flāsh-nou
noun
A vision, similar to moving forward or backwards in time, except that the flash vision is exactly what you are seeing or doing right now.
For example: A “flashnow” at this very moment, is you reading this definition posted in my blog.

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pět’ə-mĭz’əm
noun
Negative or gloomy views about domestic pets, such as “The dog, will probably get run over by a car,” or “Why did we buy a pet, it will eventually die anyway.”

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krāk-tŏl’ə-jĭst
noun
One who assists drug mules who swallow condoms full of crack to smuggle across borders, by either preparing or retrieving the drugs.

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rāk’smĭth’
noun
A talented plastic surgeon who specializes in breast implants.

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nō’dŭk-tĭv’ĭ-tē
noun
The quality often seen in electronics, especially computers, blackberries and other gadgets that sideline one’s daily plan or “to-do” list because of problems and extensive troubleshooting, killing tons of time and causing great anguish and frustration, rather than making the individual more efficient.
(Most devices running Windows operating system cause severe noductivity.)
An activity that zaps tons [...]

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kəm-pāsh’ən
noun
A deep feeling of sympathy and sorrow for someone who should have been swallowed instead of conceived.

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nět wûrth’kwāk’
noun
The shakeup of personal finance due to events such as the housing market collapse, the devaluation of the dollar, and the general ineptness of the bush administration.

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pyōō-bŏn’ĭk plāg
noun
A contagious, sometimes fatal disease that causes one to frequently touch themselves.

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yŏn’kŭm’ĭng trāf’ĭk
noun
A car heading towards you that swerves into your lane due to fatigue.

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pē’nĭ-lĭt’ər-ĭt
adjective
Unable to write one’s name in the snow while urinating.

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drĭngk hān’dē-kāp’
noun
A compensation, typically measured in shots, allowing lightweights and heavy drinkers to compete fairly in a drinking contest.

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kāzh’ōō-əl sāt’ər-dā’
noun
Any day of the week where one stays home and wears pajamas all day.

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dē-bŏk’sərd
verb
Similar to being debriefed.

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hō-dā’shəs
noun
A remarkable or noteworthy hooker.

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shā-mŏŏr’
noun
Love of another person, but unbeknownst to them, the love is only for their money.

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